(Just a little something to think about over the weekend.)
Ever wonder how the world truly sees you? We are all guilty of skewing the view when it comes to assessing ourselves. Some things we blow WAY out of proportion and other things we underestimate. As women, I think it is innate behavior to be critical of ourselves. This process of learning-to-love-myself that I have chosen to go through has me thinking about such things. Has me diggin' deep to find out why I choose to go down the road of self-loathing when the path to self-acceptance is a much more pleasant journey. Am I really as bad as I make myself out to be? Is all the self-criticism warranted? Lately I have been met with comments, statements or questions regarding this subject. And it got me to wonderin' just what I look like from the other side. Do others see what I see? Do they really see that wad of jiggly bits plastered on my hips? Are they aware of the unruly rat's nest atop my head on any given humid day? Do they place as much importance as I do on the mound of muffin top spilling over my jeans? Are my wrinkles a nuisance to them or do they actual view them as something more pleasant? Like maybe signs of a very happy life...remnants of miles and miles of smiles? Of course, we've all been privy to the cursory compliment. That one issued as a obligatory response to some comment made by ourselves...you know, the compliments we are sometimes fishing for without ever realizing we are that desperate to hear. But I'm beginning to think, despite those token compliments, we are not what we think we are when looking through the eyes of others. And that, my friends, is a good thing.
Today I have a little challenge for you. Whoever you come in contact with, take a second to really look at them, recognizing the wonderful things you see but may take for granted. Now here's the challenging part. Take the time to apply that same concept to yourself. Take one thing that bugs you...you know we all have at least one thing. Me, maybe I have more than most, but that is another story. Even the most self-assured person has at least one thing that is the bane of their existence. Now, reframe your thinking. Think of it in terms of how someone else would most likely see it. Instead of "fat, jiggly bits", maybe I could stretch it to "wonderful, womanly curves". Rather than "lady with a hot temper", I could become "passionate and deep thinking". Get the idea? Then smile. Add to your laugh lines. Cause life is too short to always be critical of ourselves. We need to put on those rose colored glasses from time to time when we look in the mirror. Take time today to give yourself some love...I DARE YA!
U AMAZE me.....seriously AMAZE ME!!!! :):):):):):):):):):):):)
ReplyDeleteYou should write a column for the paper, seriously!
ReplyDeleteI agree with Amy! Do you watch Sex and the City at all? We dont have cable but I like to watch the reruns on TBS. You remind me of Carrie when she is talking to herself when she writes her column...you sound like what she is writing for her column. Which equals great advice for us all. I was upset with myself when I went dress shopping...I was hoping to lose more lbs before i went and it actually turned out better! I was a size 18 last summer and when she measured me she told me she was ordering me a size 14 gown! I wear about a size 16/14 pants...but in wedding gown world...sometimes the dresses are bigger than your own size. So I was happy and loved my body a little bit more when I left! :)
ReplyDeleteYou did it again Lisa, pure article material! Definitely something to think about. I've been trying to do what you suggest for some time now, and sometimes it works. Some days I actually think I am fabulous. Then again, other days I think I'm not worth much ... still trying to come to a balance between the two. It has to do with character I think, you can try and work on it, and you might even succeed to a certain point, but if you're not self-assured, I don't think there's a ready set go cure to be found. It's a slow process, but if you're surrounded by the right people, you can come a long way.
ReplyDeletexxx Peggy
Wonderful article Lisa, you have the most wonderful way of looking at things, I really enjoy your blog! I think having a positive outlook on life and surrounding yourself with family and good friends will brighten up anyone's life. I try and stay away from negative things and people as they tend to bring people down. It really does get so much easier the older I get though, I am so much happier as a person now than I was 20 years ago. You know that saying, Live, Love, Laugh! And of course, a little chocolate always helps!
ReplyDeleteI think you would be a great author.
ReplyDeleteI so agree with all the other ladies. You never cease to amaze me!!!! I can so relate with this post!!!! You know how I feel about my lip and how much heartache this has caused me. I have never been one to have found myself PRETTY. I can always find something positive in everyone else, but finding it in myself has been a tough task!!! This is something that I plan to work on. So today sweet friend, I will smile and add a few more crinkles to this face, because I am thinking of you and how blessed I am to have you in my life!!!! Wishing you a wonderful Mother's Day!!!!
ReplyDeleteGreat post! I think seeing ourselves in a true light is definitely difficult. There are times when I am SOOOO insecure and can't see any value in myself at all. And then there are times when I get a little "puffed up" about certain aspects and God has to really show me things about myself that just aren't pretty. I think that truly recognizing our faults as well as our good points is something to strive for.
ReplyDeleteThanks for making us think!
i hear you. one thing i notice is that when we do talk good about ourselves we feel bad? when we compliment ourselves, we feel bad for it. and other people still look at you and think you are bragging when in reality, we need to do this more {now don't get me wrong, there are braggers out there, lol} there should be no reason i should feel bad saying i love my legs and have my master's, kwim? now, if i could just work on the jiggly middle
ReplyDeleteYou are so right!
ReplyDeleteReading your blog is like a dose of therapy!!
My philosophy has always been 'If you can't say something nice, say nothing' & I apply it to all but myself! I find it hard to accept even genuine compliments & avoid drawing attention to myself. Why? My weight, plain & simple!!
Thanks for suggesting a different viewpoint! I like the idea of wonderful womanly curves!!
Wonderfully put into words!
ReplyDeleteI'm looking at you, not in person, but judging by what you have written. You are a very thoughtful person, you love your family, and you are REAL. Jiggly parts are real parts, it's the ones that don't move that people stare at.
Thought provoking Lisa!! For many years I never felt thin enough, pretty enough, smart enough... etc. you get the picture.. Then I discovered "I am who I am" I consider myself a honest, loving, caring person and so what If I'm not a non-jiggly person as you put it. I like who I am and if others like me fine, if not thats ok. Life is too short not to live it you never know what will happen next.So find the humor in everything it's there I guarantee it and LAUGH OUT LOUD!
ReplyDeleteWhat an awesome thought provoking post!!! Love your blog my friend!! Thanks for the challenge my friend!! Happy Mother's day!!!
ReplyDeleteOh what a wonderful challenge!! I just read this tonight, so maybe tomorrow I will try it out!! I must have SOMETHING right, if my hubby is always calling me his hottie!! About the only time I feel like that is when its 100 degrees out and I'm sitting in the sun, LOL!! Take it from one on the outside looking in, you are a beautiful woman, and don't ever forget that!!
ReplyDeleteGreat post, Lisa...so funny, my head has been in the same place this week. When you see my new Ad This layout you'll understand better...but thanks for putting it all out there!
ReplyDeleteThank for a very thought provoking look at our selves. Two weeks ago i had my friend take a photo of me and she started to ask my opinion of the photos. We were using them for our blog and I had been sick for about a week. My comment was choose one I am not going to like any of them.
ReplyDeleteThen I came across Aleida's Challenge and realized the importance of taking our photos accepting ourselves. I was moved by her story and posted it on my blog.
Daily think of what you are Grateful for and the rest will be less important.
Any way I came by to thank you for your comments on The Next Step Challenge and hope you will play along this month!
Gayle
jgwm.blogspot.com
TheNextStepChallenge.blogspot.com
I am so very excited....It is 12:30am, No kids screaming....hubby just went off to bed....peace and quiet and I just read a few of your blog post....I have been hear before but I am always interupted and well life takes over. So here I am again. You tell the most wonderful stories. I recently went through a day realizing just how much people really do analyze you....Me not so much. But this day throughought the day I had several comments...Let me give a little me background. I live very simple you will always see me in jeans and a t-shirt even at church. I love to walk around in my socks. hardly ever put my make-up on and rarely wear jewelry including my wedding ring. These are small details in our very busy lives to me. On this day...the first comment was you look good today, you are wearing make-up, earrings and your wedding ring. 3 people 3 of the same comments. I have a hard enough time remembering your name after we have met let alone when you wear jewelry and make-up. I really trully believe though we are our own worst critic and maybe we should take what we think of ourselves...what other people tell us about ourselves and sit right in the middle. It is not perfect but it is not horrible. I think it would be just right. Just as God made us. I am realizing today since my first born will be entering high school next year and she had her first dress up dance tonight.....Life is so short. Best do all we can to make the very best of everyday because we will blink our eyes and it will all be over. Lisa, I really love your blog stories. You are going into my blogroll. Hugs.
ReplyDeleteWe could call it the "Lisa Howard show!!
ReplyDeleteGreat & positive advice... ♥ it!
ReplyDeleteHave a VERY HAPPY Mother's Day! :-)
Oh Lisa, what a thing to think about! But yes, I do get stumped when I try to make L/O's a lot more often than I would like! If I follow a sketch it's easier for me, but even then I still tend to have a hard time with them. I don't get it why I have an easier time making bird houses and boxes. It's a mystery to me!
ReplyDeleteOh and Happy Mother's Day!
ReplyDeleteWow Lisa this is an amazing post. I can definitely relate to this one. Thanks and Happy Mothers day!
ReplyDeleteAaah, your posts are always so inspirational and refreshing. Thanks, lisa, for challenging me to redefine how I think b/c, I think you're right that as women especially, we definitely see a lot of negatives. As hard as it may be, I will try to see my muffin top (b/c I have one too... sigh) as a reward for the beautiful children I have (as I totally blame them for it since it arrived exactly 1 day after the birth of chloe, lol). Hope you had a wonderful mother's day, my friend!
ReplyDelete